Upon arriving in Japan, we had to take a week long course about
This, That, and The Other Thing. Part of this class also including
a very brief overview of Japanese history, culture, and customs.
It was very fascinating, and I actually want to sit in on the class that
they have for the kids too.
I'm going to share with you some pointers that I learned from
the adult class with you here......
* In Japan, you may shake hands or bow. If you chose to bow,
NEVER, EVER, EVER make eye contact! EVER!
To bow while making eye contact is a sign of aggression.
Even if you smile while making eye contact, it is STILL rude.
To bow properly, you must bow as low as the one who gave it first.
Whoever bowed first, must stand up straight first.
You should either keep your arms and hands flat against your sides
of your body, or crossed in front of your lap while bowing.
* In Japan, volume control is a big deal. When riding any public
transportation (bus or train), everyone keeps their tone of voice down.
They also set their cell phones to vibrate or off so as not to disturb those
around them. When walking in Japan, you will not hear "BOOM! BOOM!"
coming from loud speakers in a car while it cruises by. You will also not hear
loud yelling, screaming, whining, crying, children. Even when they play,
Japanese children seem to contain their laughter to a certain volume.
* Littering is serious business in Japan! You should NEVER litter.
They are very clean, neat, and orderly. I have seen them pick up trash
off the ground that wasn't their own. In America, we think: "I'm not picking
that up because it is not mine. Let someone else take care of it". Another
point worth mentioning is that, ironically, it can be challenging to find a
trash receptacle. So, if you go to a park for a picnic lunch, there will likely
be no trash can. What should you do? You take EVERYTHING that you
brought into the park back out with you when you leave.
* Japanese nationals are big on gift giving. And a lot more goes into it
then you may think. If you give a gift to a Japanese native, you should
not expect them to open the gift in front of you. It is custom for them
to open it after you have gone separate ways. Now, if you receive a
gift, you should wait to open it until you're away from the giver as
mentioned, however, sometimes they will insist you open it right then.
If that is the case, there is a certain way to do that. First, you should NEVER
just tear into the wrapping paper like a child on Christmas morning.
You should open the package slowly and carefully. Japanese folks put a lot
of time and effort into wrapping a gift to ensure it is done well. I have been
told that they also use high quality wrapping paper. Not like that Dollar Tree
stuff you used on your kids birthday gift last year. So, unwrap the gift slowly,
carefully, while preserving the paper, ribbons, bows, etc. So, you've opened
your gift, now what? You do NOT crumple or throw any of it away!
If you are the one visiting the gift giver, you take every piece of paper, ribbon,
bows, gift, all of it with you when you leave. If they are at your home, you
wait until they leave, and then you decide what you want to do with
the paper, bows, etc.
* There is even a proper and improper way to give and receive an item!
If you are given a gift or business card with both hands (as this will usually
be the case), you should receive the item with BOTH hands. It is rude to
take an item half heatedly or with just one hand when it is given to you
with proper effort. If you receive a business card with both hands, you
should also take it with both hands as mentioned above. But, you should
also note that you should NEVER put the business card in your back pocket
of your pants. You should also be aware that you should NEVER fold the card
in half. Japanese nationals carry a case especially for business cards.
If you don't have such a case, you should place the card into your wallet
or carry it in your hand until you are out of sight from the giver.
* It is customary to give the gift of money for a wedding or funeral.
However, when giving the gift, you should be aware of what colors
you chose for the envelope and/or ribbons. For weddings, RED or WHITE
are the acceptable colors because they are symbolic of celebration. For
funerals, BLACK or WHITE are symbolic of condolences. Now, I'll
admit, I do not know if you need to use the two colors together, or if
you can use them alone. I need to find that out for sure.
* And, now for your favorite thing of all....... chopsticks!
Yes, there is a proper and improper way to use them.
Yes, hold them together while eating. And, yes, in Japan it is
possible to eat rice with them. I've known this for years. After
Husband and I married, he told me about Japanese rice. In
America, we tend to make our rice light and fluffy. In Japan,
it is sticky, and clumps together, making it easier to eat with chopsticks.
When using chopsticks you NEVER wave them in the air at anyone or
at anything. You also NEVER, EVER pass food from your chopsticks
to another's chopsticks. This is reserved for funerals ONLY. They
use chopsticks to pass the bones of their cremated deceased from
one family member to another to be placed in a jar. You should also
NEVER stand your chopsticks upright in your food. This is also a
funeral custom.
* And finally, I'll touch on behavior. In our class, we were told that
our greatest concern should be our behavior while we're out in public.
We should be respectful and mindful of those around us. Not all
Japanese may speak English, but they DO know English phrases.
We should also remember that we are ambassadors of the United Sates.
They watch us and may make judgement about everyone else who
is from our country. It was brought to our attention that our
relationship with Japan is strained right now because of some
very serious offenses that some military or their dependents
have committed. I'm hoping that things will turn around for the
better in the very near future.
I hope you enjoyed reading about customs from the land of the rising sun.
And, I hope you'll continue to follow us on our journey as we go through
this crazy adventure!
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