Fairy tales & Marriage

As a teenager, I would lay in bed, praying to God, asking Him if 

He had a husband for me. A man who wanted a girl like me

to be his wife. 

As a young adult, I still prayed for a man to be my husband; 

one who would be faithful, honest, caring, and love me

all of the days of my life. (I was starting to worry because I felt

that I would be an "old maid" forever as I began to approach 
the ripe old age of twenty.)

Then, it happened one day. A good friend of mine set me up

on a blind date with a wonderful man who eventually asked 

my hand in marriage. 

So, then the bliss began. Ideas of how it would all be. 

We would love each other everyday. We'd never get 

irritated with each other. It would be just like living a fairy tale.

After about a week had passed since saying, "I do!", my dreamy 
fairy tale ideas of life had seemed to quickly turn into a suspense mystery.

Why weren't we getting along? Why couldn't he see things my way?
Why did we have to have pineapple and ham pizza..... again?

As the years passed, I seemed to focus more on our differences.
And, I viewed those differences as a flaw. I felt we weren't similar enough.
He is laid back, I'm uptight.
He has a sense of humor, I'm serious.
He is a pack rat, I'm a minimalist. 
He insists he have meat on his pizza, I'm a vegetable lover. 

And, I say to him, "You drive me nuts!", and he will look at 
me and say, "And, I will always love you." And, that would drive 
me more crazy still. 

But, then, as the pages began to turn in our life together, I started 
to see us differently. Sure, he hasn't changed. But, my view has changed.

He is still laid back, but his ease balances me out.
His sense of humor makes a difficult situation more bearable and
much less stressful.
He is still a pack rat, but I think that one day, he just might 
be the envy of our children's friends.
And, we still can't agree on pizza. 

When we were first married, I thought I'd have a fairy tale life. 
The fluffy, superficial kind of fairy tale. 
Living in a modern day castle while wearing luxury clothes.
I wanted an easy life. A life filled with shopping, shoes, and friends.
And, I suppose that some people have a marriage like that.
But, we don't. Instead, we are living an adventure.
Our life is a crazy ride, unfolding before us, and we 
hold tight to each other's hand, as we go through it all. 
   
And, over time, I learned that it's not about singing birds, 
fancy houses, or a luxury car. It's about sharing diaper duty, 
washing and drying dishes side by side, visits to the ER, 
and watching each other turn gray. Sure, I'll never dance 
in a fancy ballroom, but true love is about dancing in the kitchen,
to a favorite song, by a single light after the children are all in bed. 
It's about making a sick or tired spouse feel more comfortable, 
when I already feel exhausted myself. It's about praying 
for the one I walk through this life with, for better or worse, 
for richer or poorer, in sickness and health. 

Yes, he still drives me nuts. But, when he tells me, "And, I'll always
love you", I know that this marriage isn't meant to be a fairy tale. 
But that we were brought together to learn and to grow as one, 
with God leading the way.