Lenten Season

It is well into the Lenten season.

 During this Lenten season, I've been spending much time with God.

And, in doing so, I've been learning to let go of so much more.

Letting go of old anger, hurts, bad habits, worry, anxiety, fear, control (or rather, the illusion of it)

criticism, and complaining. 

It's been hard. But, God has already been working inside my heart; I can tell. 

Instead of getting angry, I pray. 

Instead of criticizing, I look for the bright side of the situation. 

I don't try to control things anymore. 

And, I don't get as frustrated when things don't go as planned.

I let go, and let God. 

He is in the pilot seat now. 

I just don't want to be in that position anymore. 

It's too stressful. Too painful. Too heavy. It just wears me out.

Now, I just let God. 

I let Him guide me.

I let Him show me.

I let Him lead me.

And, I pray.

I wait. 

I listen. 

I follow. 

Yes, I've been letting go of so much more lately. 

Only this time, it is good. 

I've been struggling with anger for a long time.

I lashed out, spoke harshly; I made my own family miserable.

My mind would race and race with anger. It seemed that it controlled me.

I knew that things needed to change. 

For years, I felt like I was in a straight-jacket of anger. 

I wiggled, I twisted, I turned, I pulled, but I never got loose.

Then, I prayed, and I admitted to God that I was not in control of anything.

Nothing. 

That was so painful. 

But, this was the key to my freedom. 

As soon as I prayed and admitted that I was in control of nothing; the shackles fell to the ground.

God purged the anger from my heart. He broke the grip that it had on me.

I could feel myself breathe in deeply as if I hadn't taken a deep breath in years. 

I knew then, that it was over. God had set me free.   

I was no longer a prisoner to anger. 

I prayed about old hurts too. 

And, God set me free from those as well. 

It has been amazing! 

All this time, I thought, "If only we could move, things would be so much better!"

But, in truth, nothing would have been better if we moved, because I was still the same.

Would I still like to move? Most certainly. But, I see now, that it's not the place that makes

things better, but the person. I would've been miserable no matter where we lived.

I needed God to scrub out my heart and fill it with His goodness. 

And, thankfully He has! 

 

The Lenten season isn't over yet, and I'm very excited to see what 

the Lord will reveal to me next. I can hardly wait! 

May our heart be filled with goodness, love and joy.